I am creatively fearless and totally self-expressed...I think?

What does this mean exactly? Well as some of you may or may not know I am taking a workshop right now entitled "The Art of Creativity." I have had to do some "strange" assignments for the workshop, (all surprisingly worthwhile) with the intent to reach this goal of becoming creatively fearless and self-expressed. But what does this mean? Well, it means a lot of things, but it's an interesting subject and not a bad idea for something to reflect on every now and then...

One of the major steps one must take in order to achieve this in life is to abandon our FEAR. Here are some examples of what this means for me:

1. I have always harbored a fear of REJECTION. I fear rejection because I know how it will make me feel - like crying, like I am no good, there is no hope for me, might as well not try. So I fear these "events" before they even take place, and end up avoiding the fiasco altogether. Right from the get-go I make excuses for why I CAN'T. Well, obviously this is no good. Rejection, afterall, is not necessarily a bad thing. We can learn and grow - often need to learn and grow - from these experiences. Good things are often worth the wait, and if you are feeling discouraged or having a hard time getting somewhere, the ability to believe in yourself, I mean really believe in yourself, and continue to push yourself will often find you somewhere you never dreamt possible before. This is because you become mentally stronger-able to handle a few punches at this point and brush 'em off; you've also become more knowledgeable about yourself, your capabilities, expectations, standards, etc. Perhaps you'll even put a few more notches under your belt so you become even more qualified to achieve your goals and realize your desires than ever before; then, when something good comes along, you can be absolutely sure about it and put every ounce of effort into it. If we succumb to our fear, we will achieve nothing, and be nobody. Sometimes the things that seem so scary and hard, are the most worthwhile and fulfilling.

2. Fear of FAILURE: Recently I noticed that when a new opportunity, idea, or anything like this comes up, I automatically start thinking of all the ways I will fail. Of course, this is discouraging! How am I supposed to accomplish anything if all I can see is failure, defeat, failure, disappointment??? Uchhhh! Who lives like this!?! Well I have a feeling many people do. As soon as I realized this pattern in my life, I told myself to stop with the negative affirmations already, and instead, when something comes up, to start visualizing all the ways I can succeed. "How can I succeed?" Not, "how can I fail?"

What are you afraid of?

To become creatively fearless and totally self-expressed, I would have to do away with envy and jealousy in every way. I don't even like those words, but sometimes feel that they rule my life! What a way to live huh!? No way, not for me. From now on, I vow to be fearless and to find ways to indulge in creativity everyday, which means that I allow time for selfishness - time for myself, (it's okay!) because myself matters!! I vow to dig deep into who I am, and to live as I am. I will live presently and in the moment of everyday, every hour, every minute, and lead a fulfilling life. Out of love, I suggest you do the same : )

"And the day came, when the risk, to remain tight as a bud,
was more painful, than the risk it took to blossom."
-Anais Nin